Charmed, I'm Sure
by King512
Summary: Tuffnut doesnt get what he bargained for when he buys a love charm from Trader Johann. A side story of Cotton Armor And Lead Wings describing some events happening parallel to it. More general yaoi funness. Rated M for crude humor and sexual references.
1. Prologue-Oops

Prologue, "Oops"

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X-X-X-X

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Tuffnut had been sneaking around the village, dodging his sister as best he could, Ruffnut couldn't find out his plan. Trader Johann was at the docks, it would be his last visit until after summer. During his winter visit he had said that he was venturing far east to a strange land. Tuffnut hadn't been very interested until two simple words came out of Trader Johanns mouth 'Love charms' he had his eye on a beserker girl and the Beserkers would be returning soon. Trader Johanns visit couldn't have come at a better time.

He had a dagger on his hip, it was a fine piece of metalwork. Hiccup had made it for his 18th birthday. He felt bad for giving it up, but no one need be the wiser.

Finally, he reached the docks. The sun was falling and Trader Johann was setting up to close for the night. "Hey wait!" Tuffnut called.

"There's trouble." Trader Johann laughed.

"Do you have time to make a last minute trade?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

Tuffnut smiled widely. He tromped on board. "What are you looking for?" Johann asked.

"Last time you came by you mentioned... Love charms." His last two words were a whisper.

Johanns laughter was loud and brash. "Love charms eh? Whos the lass?"

"Keep it down!"

"Ah a secret affliction of your heart?"

"She's beautiful! Just leave it at that." Tuffnut didnt like feeling embarrassed like this but still. "I want the charm and a few decoys just in case. I have this dagger to trade."

Johann took the blade and inspected it. A razor sharp leaf shaped blade held runic etchings on one side "pride" the other; "honor". Its guard arced forward and its handle was simple with a dyed shark skin grip, the pommel was wide, making for a firm hand hold. "Its a fine blade, you'll sorely regret this trade."

"I know that, but I know what I want more." He gazed at the wares before him. "I guess I'll look while you get the charm?"

"Alright." Trader Johann climbed below deck.

Tuffnut picked up a sturdy steel axe, it was nowhere near the quality of the dagger, but it was well made. And his own axe was getting worn. Trader Johann spoke up behind him. "If you want that it will be the only decoy you can afford."

"That works, I need a new axe anyway."

Johann held out his hand with a flat square piece of rock. It had a strange marking etched into it. "Once you take this our trade is complete."

Tuffnut took it without hesitation. "How does it work?"

"Just keep it on you and the one you desire will find you irresistible."

Tuffnut grinned wide. "Thanks Johann."

* * *

X-X-X-X

It wasnt long before Tuffnut was intercepted by Ruffnut. "You went to Johanns awful late." She said accusingly.

"I just wanted to go after the main group."

"But what if he had traded away what you wanted."

Tuffnut rolled his eyes and shoved his sister. "I got a new axe. He had like, forty more."

"Your axe is perfectly fine though."

"Its getting old."

"Uh-huh. If you say so."

Tuffnut walked back to his house alongside his sister. The duo was unusually calm.

* * *

X-X-X-X

Johann frantically searched his ship. "Where did I put the damn thing!? Cursed charm and I lose it on my first trade..." He looked up, mild surprise twisting his face. "Oh... Well this will be interesting... Oops I guess." He climbed back up to the top deck. "A trades a trade I suppose."

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X-X-X-X

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AN- This is going to be a very lighthearted story running parallel to Cotton Armor and Lead Wings, why? Because drama and sad shit gets very dull and boring to write.

I would like to make people aware that I have allowed the two tribes to renounce their warring in this particular AU.


	2. Chpt 1, The Ripple Effect

Chapter, 1 - The Ripple Effect

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X-X-X-X

* * *

Tuffnut woke to commotion in the village. He grinned wildly the only time people got riled up like this was when visitors came. He lifted the loose plank in his floor quietly and pulled out the charm.

He had a hidden inner pocket in his breeches that he slid the flat stone into. He practically leapt out of his house. Sure enough the Berserkers were all about. He immediately spotted her. Long auburn hair in a herringbone braid. She was a definite shield maiden and the sword at her hip showed her strength her name was Thyra.

Tuffnut casually walked by them to the forge, only to catch a snippet of their conversation. It was Thyra speaking. "My husband is still down at the docks, he should be up soon and then we'll go get some ale, eh girls?" The words hit Tuffnut like boulders. He sagged and walked into the forge. He had brought macey with him more as an excuse than anything but it did need repairs. "Hey Gobber."

"Tuffnut! Lad!" The old smith looked at Tuffnut curiously. "Whats eating ye?"

"Nothin really. Just got bad luck." He set the mace on the table between them.

Gobber shrugged. "Do ye mind helping me around the forge? The berserkers don't know how to take care of their weapons. I've got a backlog bigger than the attitude of a monstrous nightmare."

"I won't be much help."

"A viking who can't hone an edge?" Gobber asked sarcastically, drawing a grin from Tuffnut.

Hours slid away in the company of the old smith until the sun found itself high in the sky. Tuffnut stopped the wheel. "I'm gonna go find my sister."

Gobber waved a hand signaling Tuffnut to just leave. The young viking stumbled into Eret as he walked out the smithy. "Snotlout and I are going to a pond Fishlegs found, do you want to come with?"

Tuffnut thought about it for a moment before putting his fingers to his mouth and letting a piercing two-tone whistle ring. Soon enough a Hobblegrunt fluttered down. "Eret, meet Dumbluck." The dragon chittered and purred when Tuffnut scratched it. Its color changing from purple to yellow. "How far do we go?"

Eret grinned, "Follow me, Snotlout should already be there."

* * *

X-X-X-X

Tuffnut sat with his back against a tree, the water was colder than he'd thought it would be so he was content to just talk to his friends in the water. Fishlegs looked up at the sky, "I've gotta get back to the village, my dad wants help with cleaning the house. Here girl." He called to Meatlug, the gronckle ambled over slowly. Fishlegs slid on his clothes and left.

Eret sighed. "I suppose that's my cue as well. Valka needs me for some business with the council." Eret hadn't bothered to take off his pants, but he did leave his shirt off as he walked over to Skullcrusher. He stopped and shoved Tuffnut into the water. "Not cool!" He yelled. Snotlout laughed behind him.

"Deal with it." He said simply, flying off before Tuffnut could exact revenge.

Tuffnut crawled out of the water and peeled off his soaking clothes.

"You may as well stay in." Snotlout said. "Nothing else to do until your clothes dry."

"Yeah yeah. I know." Tuffnut noticed the stone was missing. He threw up his hands in aggravation. "Oh come on... It must have fallen in the water." He groaned.

"Whats wrong with you?" Snotlout asked.

"I just lost something is all."

"Well quit being a wimp."

Tuffnut turned around and grinned wickedly. He ran and jumped into the water, colliding with Snotlout. The two vikings wrestled at first, then fought, soon they were swinging fists and moving about the shallows. After a bit the two stood, panting heavily. Tuffnut had a black eye and Snotlout came away with a busted lip. They glared at each other before laughing hysterically.

Snotlout flopped back into the water and was followed by Tuffnut. There they lay, floating around the water's surface. Spontaneously they restarted their battle, culminating as Snotlout pinned Tuffnuts arms behind his back.

Snotlout suddenly realized how smooth Tuffnuts skin was or how good he smelled. "Aren't you going to let me go?" Tuffnut asked. Snotlout snapped out of his trance and almost flung Tuffnut away.

'What just happened?' Snotlout wondered.

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X-X-X-X

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AN- I've wanted to do this ship for a while. This will have chapters for the sake of my workload and cause this is a just for fun side story.


	3. Chpt 2, A Confession

Chapter 2- A Confession

X-X-X-X

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Snotlout found his thoughts wandering to the moment in the pond more and more, Tuffnut occupying his mind. He wandered about the village aimlessly, there was little to do that day. He passed Ruffnut, she was sitting on a wall with Barf and Belch next to her.

"Whats your problem?" She asked indignantly.

"What do you mean?" He asked, more than a little shocked.

She looked at him like he was a total idiot. "You never waste a chance to flirt or act macho, whats your deal?" She hopped off her perch and sauntered over to him. "New girl in the village I should know about?"

"No. Its not that."

"Well its something, and you're gonna tell me."

"Why should I?"

She grinned maliciously. "Because I know you're the one who filled people's houses with rotten fish."

His eyes grew wide, that prank had caused such an uproar in Berk that mentioning it was likely to set off a riot. He gritted his teeth and stared at her, her gaze met his unwaveringly. "Swear on the Well of Urd."

Taken aback by the seriousness of the oath, nonetheless she covered her left eye, as tradition held. "It is sworn. You're being a bit drastic don't you think?"

"I'm being a perfectly acceptable level of drastic thankyou." He took a deep breath and let it out in one go. "Fishlegs found a pond and Eret, Tuffnut, and I went for a swim. Eret and Fishlegs left and I think I have a crush on your brother."

Ruffnut looked at him like he'd just turned purple and grown horns. She burst out laughing falling from her perch, slowly her laughter tapered off and she looked at Snotlouts ever-so-guilty face. "Oh gods... You're not joking are you?" She was met by silence.

"You..."

"Yeah."

"My brother...?"

"Yep."

"Really?"

He looked at her plainly. "Really really."

She squinted at him for a moment. "Oh I am so helping you."

"Helping me what?"

That same evil grin split her face wide. "Helping you get with my brother obviously."

"Woah now, where's the shaming spiteful Ruffnut?"

She mocked offense. "Can I not dream of love for my little brother?"

Snotlout rolled his eyes. "You're twins, so now I know you've been lying."

Her grin seemed to somehow grow wider. "Technically he was born the next day, and I'm more mature anyway." She poked Snotlout hard in the chest. "And as the mature one, I'm gonna set him up on a date."

"Not so loud!" He hissed.

"What, afraid your crush will hear?" She made kissy faces and crossed her eyes.

Snotlout flushed red, partly out of anger, partly out of embarassment. "Would you please just shut up?"

"Oh no we just started. We have a lot of talking to do."

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X-X-X-X

AN- The Well Of Urd(Urd meaning Destiny) is a fairly prominent feature of Yggdrasil. I use the oath meaning "I swear on my destiny" it holds a similar reverence to swearing on the river Styx for the Greco romans.


End file.
